Funny

I updated funny section.

Jessica Alba's Boobs

I love Jessica Alba, she should be my wife.

Jessica Alba's Boobs

Check out her boobs.

updated

me update funny bits and reviews.

Ugg

Dane Cook - SuperComedian

A friend of mine from my work just put me onto this guy named Dane Cook. The newest and greatest comedian to be dubbed Mr Bandwagon (by me). Sure, the guy is probably funny and I want to watch his new movie called Waiting, but I'll be damned if I can respect a comedian who is good looking. That just is not right.

The sole purpose of a comedian in my opinion, is to make me feel good, whether it by telling a funny joke, or going on about how crap his or her life may be. In Dane Cook's case, he may tell an amusing anictdote or two, but the guy is just too attractive.

He tells this story and all the girls are screaming and making calf eyes at him while im sitting there thinking to myself

"Man, I wish I looked like that, I'm so ugly"

I want to look at a comedian and think to myself

"Man, Im great looking arent I? I should be on television"

Here are some comedian's that make me feel good about myself


Rodney Dangerfield.

Rodney is famous for owning a club called Dangerfields, I don't think he is funny at all (apart from his little foray into the Simpsons - that was pretty classy) but he makes me feel good because he looks more like a frog than I do.


Lee Evans

I've seen Lee on a few shows, he also stars in some Sitcom that I don't know the name of, needless to say its not all that popular (but I said it anyway). Lee is one of those comedians that I sit there and watch for about 30 minutes thinking about how much funnier I am than he is when he just does something so stupid that it makes me laugh. Usually its by pulling some face. His ears are so big that its usually comical when he pulls one. Plus he sweats alot on stage. Anyone who does that gets a big thumbs up from me.


Rowan Atkinson aka Mr Bean

Rowan Atkinson. Genius, smart guy, but hes ugly. He makes me laugh and feel good about myself at the same time. You can't beat that combination

Anyway, I give Dane Cook a MEH, he is ok and says some funny stuff but he needs to get into a few celebrity boxing matches before I can respect him. 1 thumb sideways

Funny

Funny - from Bart.

Insert Title Here

Its been a few days since my last update, and let me just say this one thing. Im not sorry.

Do you know why?

Anyone? Anyone?

Nah, you've got nothing

Anyway, they reason I have not updated is because of 2 things

1) Because I didnt update
2) See number one

Plus I was away looking for some work in the ski resorts. Matt my room mate (pictured below)



and I hired a car and went to a place called Kelowna for a night couple of nights, went to the Big White job fair and had a couple of interviews. Then we went to Vernon and had a couple more interviews there. It was pretty ok, i think i may have got a job but i havent heard anything as yet so we will see what happens.

In other news, Elvis is dead.

I applied to review a couple of CD's for this CD company in Vancouver. They didn't even reply to my email. Everyone is so rude these days, the least they could do is reply to my email. This is what I wrote to them

___________

Heya.

I've never heard of any of those bands that you mentioned in the craigslist ad, but if there is one thing I love doing, its reviewing things.

Check out my blog, i have a great review of Mark's Butt. I doubt you would find a better review than that anywhere.

Another one of my passions in life is music. I love music, i also love to hate commercial music that has been shoved down my throat by some fat-cat in some studio who decided some music was worth listening to because the singer has a big pair of breasts and blond hair.

So if you like what I have written in my blog (and this incredible email) than I would be happy to review some CD's for you. So long as I am not censored and if I hate a CD I'm free to say that I hate it.

Honest review's always make the best reviews right?

Cheers,

Cameron Murray
________________

I figure the least they could do is tell me piss off and stop wasting their time, that wouldn't be too much to ask. Maybe they don't like the fact that my reviews are childish and immature? I don't know, I guess maybe im not cut out to be an international independent CD reviewer.

Woah is me.

Quote of the Day - I wish, I wish that something would happen. Radiohead

Alaska - Juneau Part II

After rising early the second morning in Juneau, Christian and I got some food from Subway and then did some shopping. I got an ALASKA jumper for $10 and some other bits and pieces of crap (Like a bear you squeeze and poo comes out of its bum)

We then took a hike up above the city up this trail that was pretty close to the hostel, maybe 100 metres up the road. It was raining pretty heavily and was kinda taxing but it was worth it once we got to the top. Took a nice picture or two.. here is one of them


A view of Juneau from the trail

Once this was completed, we did a lap around the town, looked at a few bits and pieces, took in the 3 (?!) massive cruise ships that were parked in the harbour and all the tourists that came with them. There was also a statue of the dog "Pasty Ann" (I think) that used to run out to greet cruise ships and become an American National Icon in the process.. ok, so maybe im being a dick and the dog was only known in Juneau, but it was a nice story anyway. Apparantly they even used a hair of the dog to make the status. It sort of made me miss my dead dogs. Sigh.

Because of the incessent(ant)? rain, I was also treated to a nice view of the surrounding mountains, that had sprouted some waterfalls. I got a couple of good photos of those as well, but in the interest of space, here is a picture of a signpost, a pretty typical tourist thing to have in the town, but I thought it was interested to see how far I was away from home


You can see the mountains in the background, 4 waterfalls were running from it. Sweet.

There is also a person that blends in with the library carpark there. See if you can spot them.

After this was done, Christian cooked up some pasta, which was much appreciated and then a whole bunch of the people in the hostel got into a conversation about a whole range of things, all of them interesting. The only one i really recall was raggin' on this guy that stayed at the hostel that thought he knew EVERYTHING there was to know about travelling and language (im sure you have all met this guy. He is generally the loudest most obnoxious person in a room, and no, its not me).

He sounded like a robot know it all - some of the things he said include:

"The head of that particular trail is precisely 3.2 miles down the road. You can find it by walking exactly 3 blocks, then turning sharply left following a steep incline. You will need about 2 litres of water for this trail as it can get quite difficult. You should also wear appropriate footwear as there are some difficult pieces of terrain you will need to traverse."

/me does robot dance in background

"I am proficient in over 3 forms of communication. I am fluent in Spanish, German and English"

I am C-3PO, human cyborg relations.

"I have considered teaching people language, but I would NEVER teach anyone in first year. They are simply unprepared and I would NOT waste my time."

Do the kids a favour, and NEVER go NEAR a school. Please.

Anyway, it was all fun, and I ended up going to bed around 1:30 or so. I had to get up at 5 the next morning for my flight to Anchorage. Needless to say I would be tired the next day...

Boy - Do you think he makes it home alright Dad??
Dad - Well, he must do because he is writing this blog isnt he?
Boy - He is a computer??
Dad - You're a dull boy Billy.

Anyone not like my pictures?

I don't rain on your parade, so don't rain on mine.

Speaking of rain, its raining outside and no one wants to give me a job so I might do my part 2 of Juneau Alaska trip shortly. Thats great news hey.

"Arse"

Rob Performing the Mega-Smash Hit "This is the A-Chord" by the M.F Pigs. What an ass.

Just as recently as right then, I was informed that my less than explifamory (you know that word that means not real good) use of English had struck again, in this particular case in the form of the word "Arse"

I decided to do a little bit of research on the topic and it turns out Rob was totally correct. Dictionary.com tells me the following

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

arse

n 1: the fleshy part of the human body that you sit on; "he deserves a good kick in the butt"; "are you going to sit on your fanny and do nothing?" [syn: buttocks, nates, butt, backside, bum, buns, can, fundament, hindquarters, hind end, keister, posterior, prat, rear, rear end, rump, stern, seat, tail, tail end, tooshie, tush, bottom, behind, derriere, fanny, ass] 2: excretory opening at the end of the alimentary canal [syn: anus, arsehole, asshole]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

while the word ass as I used it actually means



n. Vulgar Slang pl. ass·es (sz)

1.
1. The buttocks.
2. The anus.
2. Sexual intercourse.


ass1 Audio pronunciation of "ass" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (s)
n. pl. ass·es (sz)

1. Any of several hoofed mammals of the genus Equus, resembling and closely related to the horses but having a smaller build and longer ears, and including the domesticated donkey.
2. A vain, self-important, silly, or aggressively stupid person.


as2 Audio pronunciation of "ass" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (s)
n. pl. as·ses (sz, sz)

1. An ancient Roman coin of copper or copper alloy.
2. An ancient Roman unit of weight equal to about one troy pound.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If memory serves me correctly I used it as something like "a pain in the ass"

So I guess by this I actually inadvertedly meant "a pain in the ancient Roman coin of copper or copper alloy"

So in all cases where I said ass please replace it with "ARSE" unless I actually meant a Roman coin of copper or copper alloy.

Thanks for pointing it out Rob. Merci.

Thanksgiving

I didn't really want this to be a seperate post to the last one but I couldn't insert any more pictures into my last post so i had to make a new one. Oh well.

Such is Life (NK)

I just realised that today is Thanksgiving, an American and possibly other places in the world tradition that I don't pretend to know the origins of. All I know is that you get to eat one of these things


What an ugly bird

I'm sure the origins of Thanksgiving are pure and noble and all the rest of it, but where does cooking up a big ugly bird come into it?

Someone from circa 1600 - Umm, i just thought of a new holiday, we give thanks to and while we doing it we eat that ugly bird thats been crapping all over the grass
Wife - Ok. Good idea Frank

Maybe someone (me probably) should make up a new holiday called Thank God for Wild Turkey


Wild Turkey - I hate it but if it gets me an extra paid holiday its great!

Im thinking the holiday will be on the 22nd of April each year (except when it falls on a weekend, in cases like this the holiday should be extended to 3 days), people go out and buy wild turkey from the shops (or steal it, whatever floats your boat) and share it with their loved ones. The best thing about it is you don't have to eat a big ugly bird, you can just eat chicken, or better yet a cow. Cows are pretty cute